Tag: life

Desires: Do What You Genuinely Want

The author writes how parents, society, and Instagram had imposed their desires on him, but he followed what he genuinely wanted in life.

I have desires-

  • I should read books on politics. 
  • I should go to the gym.
  • I should learn Taekwondo.
  • I should read novels.
  • I should cook every meal myself.
  • I should do stock trading.
  • I should start a business.
  • I should run every day.
  • I should write poems.
  • I should write songs.
  • I should become a DJ.
  • I should become a singer.
  • I should learn singing…

MY Desires

These are some of the desires that are amplified when I use Instagram.

I’m not saying these are wrong.

I’m just saying that these aren’t MY desires.

These are other people’s desires.

And if I do what other people want, I’ll stay unhappy all my life.

The problem is that it’s not something that is imposed on me by other people. 

I seem to compare myself with these people on Instagram who are doing these things. 

And my mind, like most people, also wants those things.

But it’s important to do what I genuinely want.

Not follow others.

I need to be aware when I am thinking some desire is mine, while it’s not.

On one hand, it’s not okay to follow desires that are not my own.

On the other hand, it can be okay sometimes to have desires that are good for me- like going to the gym. 

So yeah, in life we tend to follow others, but what we should strive to do is be our own leaders and not follow others.

Story Time

When I was in class 11, I was studying physics, chemistry, maths… But I wanted something else in life.

I wanted to start a business. I wanted to be creative. 

So in 2019 I decided to study philosophy. And then business administration. 

And now I have a Master of Business Administration(MBA) degree. 

If I had stuck to science subjects, which my parents and society wanted me to study, I wouldn’t feel happy.

I would feel stuck and depressed.

So yeah, do what you genuinely want, not what others expect of you.

Thank you for reading this line! It means a lot.

The Struggle: Feeling Sleepy And Still Writing

The author writes about how in spite of feeling sleepy, he is struggling to writing a blog post early morning.

I’m writing this as I feel sleepy. I woke up minutes ago and I started writing.

It is 06:55AM and I still feel sleepy. 

But I slept on time yesterday.

And as I remember about yesterday and think deeply about topics, I start becoming more awake.

But I feel sleepy.

I don’t drink much coffee because someone told me once that coffee worsens anxiety.

But I really want to write a blog post today. Even if it means writing badly.

Or writing something that is based on sleep and coffee.

I just know one thing — I need to write.

I’m a writer. And I will write. That’s my job.

I know I’m struggling to stay awake. But that’s the nature of life— struggle.

Struggle is the way.

If you don’t have struggles, you’re missing out on progress.

And just now I closed my eyes and I was about to fall asleep in my chair.

But I forced myself to stay awake.

The struggle is real.

Right now I’m thinking about making a hot drink for myself. Not coffee but Boost(without sugar).

I’ll be right back.

I just made two cups of Boost(hot drink) for myself and my elder sister.

And after doing this activity itself I feel less sleepy.

Now the time is 07:28AM and I don’t even know if what I’m writing makes any sense.

Thank you for reading this line! It means a lot.

life is big, but nothing compared to you

This blog is about a song that makes the author realize that life is big but nothing compared to that special person(you).

I am listening to this song called “Chuye Dekho Amay” by Tanveer Evan.

And I love it.

It’s in Bengali but here’s the link to the meaning of its lyrics.

And as I listen to the part where the Tanveer sings “Tumi chuye dekho amay/Tumi chuye dekho amay/chuye dekho amay/amake joriye buke rekhe dao”, I get emotional.

It literally means “Try seeing if you can touch me, try seeing if you can touch me, see if you can touch me, embrace me and hold me close to your chest.”

It doesn’t remind me of any memory. But I can feel it.

What I want to convey through this example is that, life is big, but nothing compared to that person who means so much to you.

Also it doesn’t have to be anything romantic. It can be spiritual as well.

You can sign it to Lord Shiva and it still holds its meaning to a great extent.

Anyways this is a little detour from hope, which is the topic of my blog. But I think it’s fine once in a while.

Thanks for reading this line! It means a lot.

Ishq! Ishq! Ishq!!! (Love! Love! Love!!!)

The author writes about a poetry show he and his sister went to see the previous day. It was quite an unique and a great experience.

I just can’t get yesterday evening’s “Ishq Hai” poetry show by Priya Malik out of my head.

Story Time: Ishq Hai

So yesterday my sister and I went to HSR Layout in Bangalore to attend a poetry show by Priya Malik that we booked on bookmyshow.

A group photo with Priya Malik(3rd from the left) and Tanmay(4th from the left)

And it was a good decision. In fact it was a great decision.

I still can’t forget that experience.

The show wasn’t just about “Ishq” or love, but it was about the subtleties of love.

How “pyaar” is different from “ibadaat” and how there are 7 levels of love and how the former six are different from “Ishq”, which is the seventh level.

And I realized yesterday that I have only ever had infatuations and that I had never felt “Ishq” for anyone.

It made me feel quite hopeful instead of sad.

At least now I know where I stand.

I also love the story of her life, the story of her and her mother.

How she would say “kuch nahi” when her mother asked her about her day. And how that changed. (don’t want to spoil too much for future audience members)

Priya Malik said that it is the distance from and absence of a thing or a person that makes us realize their value. I don’t remember the exact words though.

But I think these positive feelings of bliss and gratitude will last for days. And that’s also great for my mental health.

Why I Attended The Show

So my sister and I went to the show yesterday after my sister’s duty at NIMHANS. 

At first I was hesitant but then I thought “What the hell! Let’s try something new.”

Because generally I go to music concerts and action movie screenings. But this was the first time I went to a poetry show on “Ishq Hai” which is an emotional experience.

There’s nothing to think or analyze like I do with my data analysis career.

All you have to do is open your heart and feel. 

Yes! That plain old “feeling” in this age of AI.

And after watching the show we had dinner at Leon’s Burger.

Then we returned to our rented place.

So yeah yesterday evening was filled with blissful thoughts and intense feelings.

And I’d never want to forget yesterday evening even if the photos get lost.

Also Priya Malik did a “meet and greet” and we got her autographs and clicked a group photo.

Conclusion

And yeah! That was quite something!!!

One thing I learnt from this experience is that everything happens for its own good. There’s nothing to worry about.

God is there and things will happen at the right time.

All we need to do is surrender to God!

Thank you for reading this line! It means a lot.

College Memories: Pleasant And Negative

The author writes about his regular college memories and how they are influencing his mind in both pleasant and negative ways.

I’ve gone to regular college but I quit.

Due to my anxiety, I quit regular college and got admitted to another college in online mode.

The memories of the regular college were both pleasant and negative. 

Sometimes they haunt me. 

College Memories: What Was Possible

They remind me of what was possible. Of what I could have accomplished.

I did avoid regular college and I got admitted to online college.

But I don’t regret my decision. It was what was appropriate for that situation.

There’s no other alternative I could have gone for given what I knew back then.

There’s a stigma around online and distance education in India and also around the world.

And that may kind of hurt my career.

But it’s in the past.

I don’t want it to turn into a bad memory.

Nor do I want it to poison my soul. Because it is exactly that.

It’s going to make me negative and have regrets which I don’t want.

So I’ll stop thinking about it. I’ll focus on the present and future. Not the past.

Right now I am an MBA post-graduate. And I have completed my Bachelor’s and Master’s. 

Conclusion

I need to focus on how to move forward, not look back and have regrets.

Thanks for reading this line! It means a lot.

Bhagavad Gita: Significant Changes In My Life

The author writes how the Bhagavad Gita is changing this life and how a healthy level of doubt is necessary and alright.

I’ve been reading the Bhagavad Gita and I already see changes in my life.

Bhagavad Gita : Story Time

I recently started cooking lunch and dinner. 

Earlier me and my sister used to order lunch and dinner from restaurants.

But now I cook them.

Although I order the curry and side dishes, I prepare the main staple dish.

I cook rice or rotis. And order vegetable or chicken curry.

And I also know that my psychiatric medication has a big part to play in this.

But I also think the Bhagavad Gita definitely has a part in causing these changes in my life.

I feel more grounded and am sleeping better.

I’m having less problems waking up early or sleeping early.

Religion

The Bhagavad Gita is a Hindu scripture. But I’m not a Hindu, I’m an Adivasi(Saridharam- truth religion).

But I find that reading the Bhagavad Gita helps me a lot.

I can relate to Arjuna from Chapter 1 itself.

Doubts

Sometimes I doubt if indeed the Gita is the word of God. Or whether Gita is true.

And I think it is good to doubt to some extent.

I don’t need to have blind faith. I need to challenge the Gita and experience its truths for myself in real life.

Conclusion

I need to treat it as a manual but the real realisation would only be possible if I act and actually “assemble the parts” or “attain spiritual realisation” or “moksh” by following it.

So yeah I’m reading the Bhagavad Gita and this journey never ends because unless one attains “moksh”, there’s no stopping.

Thank you for reading this line! It means a lot.

Responsibilities Are Necessary

Responsibilities teach you to be a better person more than any classes or reading books.

When I was in class 11 and I failed in class, I didn’t take any household responsibilities. 

My parents did everything for me.

And I just had to study.

But at that time I was facing problems related to sitting down to study.

I think if I had taken some household responsibilities at that time, I could have avoided failing in class.

And I am saying this not from a place of regret but maturity and knowledge.

Responsibility in my opinion makes you more realistic because you have to deal with life on a practical level.

And you also need to deal with all kinds of people.

You have to get out there.

Be it buying groceries, throwing garbage, cleaning your house, washing your clothes, cooking, etc. It requires being practical and facing society.

I’m not saying that you need to make conversations with everybody, but what I’m saying is that “Don’t get angry if someone misbehaves with you or speaks rudely to you.”

Responsibilities teach you many things like humility, perseverance, focus, groundedness, etc.

Thanks for reading this line! It means a lot.

Heartbreak Is Real: Understand Her

The author writes about how even after a heartbreak a woman needs to be understood by the man. Just because she rejects a man doesn’t allow the man to blame her. A man needs to understand her.

Heartbreak is real, but it’s necessary.

You need to understand the girl’s perspective.

You propose to her. She rejects you.

Maybe she doesn’t feel attracted to you.

Maybe she has some reasons to reject you.

Maybe she has so many problems in her own life that she can’t say “yes”.

Maybe she just wants you as a “friend”.

Your heart breaks.

But you can’t and shouldn’t think only from one side.

If you didn’t get that heartbreak then you wouldn’t get the opportunity to understand the girl.

You need to understand her.

You need to heal yourself by understanding her.

You need to smile and forgive her.

Because she also has feelings, thoughts,etc.

And these feelings and thoughts deserve your understanding.

Thank you for reading this line! It means a lot.

Face Your Fears: Stop Being Toxic

The author writes about his experiences with fear, what happens when he doesn’t face them and what happens when he does.

Fear is an obstacle for everyone.

If you don’t face your fear, your life becomes toxic.

I don’t know why that happens but I’ve noticed it in my own life.

When I don’t face my fears, I become toxic.

I start to say negative things. 

I start blaming God.

I start hating myself.

I stop being grateful.

But when I face your fears, I start waking up early, saying positive things, loving God, loving myself, and becoming grateful again.

Because fear is a strong emotion.

But fear is also an illusion. 

It isn’t real. 

So face your fears. Follow your dreams. 

Thank you for reading this line! It means a lot.

Reading the Bhagavad Gita: Changing My Life

The author reads the Bhagavad Gita daily and admits that it’s changing his life. Despite not being a Hindu, he follows the Gita for wisdom.

I’ve been reading the Bhagavad Gita lately and I think it is an amazing book that suits my temperament.

The Bhagavad Gita: Waking Up Early

And I think it is slowly changing my life.

I’m waking up early and following a routine.

I think it is important to follow a spiritual practice daily. 

Be it reading spiritual texts or meditating or lighting incense sticks or something else.

But it’s necessary for the peace of mind of the individual.

My Mother’s Example

My mother has taught me to bow down to God.

She has a Masters of Science degree and she still prays to God every day.


And I think just because you’re educated formally doesn’t mean you stop praying and become an atheist.

It means you become a more serious practitioner of spirituality.

If there’s anything that education should do to you is to open your eyes to what you don’t know.

And that humility, if your education’s good, should make you a more spiritual person.

The Caste System

Mornings are for waking up. And I read the Bhagavad Gita which gives me immense joy.

Of course there are parts about the caste system.

But I just ignore it.

Because of course it’s such an old text and there will be misinterpretations which lead to parts like the caste system.

I’m Not A Hindu

I’m not a Hindu. I’m an Adivasi. I’m born in a religion called Sari dharam which means “Truth religion” in Santhali. Sari means “Truth”.

But I love reading Bhagavad Gita. 

I choose to read the Bhagavad Gita because it has a lot of wisdom. 

Not because I don’t like my religion. 

Conclusion

Today I woke up and I thought,”Mornings are for waking up. Just wake up and start typing.”

And so I did. 

And I think the Bhagavad Gita has a great part to play in this.

Thank you for reading this line! It means a lot.