Read This to Feel Less Afraid of the Future

Do you feel afraid of the future and start worrying? In this blog post, I will share my perspective on feeling less afraid of the future.

I think it is totally okay to be afraid of the future. And it is not at all wrong if we worry about the future. In fact, a little fear and pain will motivate you. 

But when worrying becomes pointless and being afraid doesn’t help motivate you, what do you do?

I think it is in those moments of fear that we need to be courageous. We need to find the courage to say, “F*ck it! I am not going to be afraid anymore and second guess myself. I will take action.”

Recently, a person asked a question on Reddit about what career he should pursue. He said that he was having a hard time deciding. 

I wrote-

“I was feeling the same way 6months ago. I didn’t know what career should I commit to. I was confused what my purpose in life was. I also didn’t want to be in the corporate companies. I wanted to do what I felt passionate about. So I did a self-analysis. I asked myself about what successes I had in the past years. And I saw that I have some success in creating blogs and YouTube videos. I didn’t get many views or subscribers but I had posted 70 videos which most of them were low quality and I was nervous or fumbling or stammering and I had made most of them private but I had shot and uploaded 70 videos. The problem was I wasn’t getting many views. So I researched about how to grow on YouTube. And I learnt that I needed an income stream to keep myself mentally healthy and have a social life and pay expenses and make YouTube videos on the side. So I am working on my copywriting portfolio after taking a copywriting course because writing is also one of my passions.

I think it’s important to think about life like an archaeologist and not an architect. Life is about discovery and not about walking on a planned path.

I hope to make YouTube videos and generate income but I am going to do copywriting to pay my bills and build a network and friends and a social life and buy a good camera.

I remember someone told me – my main problem is not lack of knowledge of my career or purpose but lack of experience. Inaction is my greatest enemy.

So don’t worry! Just start doing what you think you love and have passionate for but also keep in mind the practical aspects of paying the bills and your long term goals. 😄”

Anirban Saren on Reddit

I think I still stand by this belief that life is about being an archaeologist (adopted by Ali Abdaal’s videos on YouTube). And it’s about self-discovery.

And it isn’t about trying to find and connect the dots backwards, it’s about believing in something strongly and following one’s heart, and trust that the dots will connect automatically.

I am working on my degree, my copywriting portfolio and moving forward slowly. 

Sometimes I worry about the future and I get anxious. But I have learned to face the fears by saying, “F*ck it!”.

I think life is not about reaching a goal, it’s about growing yourself constantly through experiences.

Conclusion

So this is my perspective-

Life is about self-discovery. Look into the future and ask yourself,”How do I want my life to be?” and take action. The dots will connect automatically when we focus on self-discovery instead of controlling the present and the future. And if the fear of the future still persists, say “F*ck it! Let’s do it.” Because life is about growing yourself constantly through experience.

Thank you for reading my blog post. Please comment- What is your perspective on feeling less afraid of the future?

Trying: The Secret Of The Universe

What is the secret of the universe that moves mountains, that accomplishes the impossible, that gives power to the good people, that makes truth win, that echoes through eternity the truth that cannot be denied?

I say it is in trying. Tenacity, trying, persistence, sticking with it.

This is the secret of the universe. It is in trying that we find success, even if we fail.

There are no shortcuts and even if there is, unless you try the eleventh time after failing 10 times, you will not succeed.

A few days ago I was very anxious of going outside my house. And I was laying in bed thinking why was I not able to study or do something consistently. And I laying in bed and saying to myself,”I am unable to go.”

But something happened. My mother asked me to get up and get ready to go. Even though I repeated my mantra “I am unable to go.” , my mother force me to get up by playing some music on the TV.

Now it is a smart TV and the controls are advanced. But my mother tried again and again to figure it out and what I saw in that moment was a mother’s unending love and tenacity for her child. She eventually figured it out and played some Santhali songs.

And I got up and we went outside as planned.

What I want to say through this anecdote is that love moves mountains. Tenacity, trying, persistence are the qualities in a person who can move mountains.

By moving mountains, I mean doing what seems impossible. It is truly inspiring.

This is why trying matters. Trying matters because it is an act of faith. You don’t know whether you will succeed or not. But you are giving your best to it despite all possibilities of failure.

Thank you for reading this blog post. I am grateful for you reading this post. Please answer this question in the comments section- On a scale of 1 to 10 how much do you agree that “trying” is the secret of the universe?

What Will Make You The Happiest?

Although this insight comes from my experience, I believe that what will make you the happiest is being yourself.

Be unique, quirky, different, find your own truth, be yourself, don’t live a common life, don’t do what is conventional, always seek your truth, etc.

Let me tell you a story. When I started writing I had no idea that I would fall in love with the process of writing and the benefits that come with writing. It led me to discover my truth instead of accepting some fixed doctrine.

Sometimes I fall into the trap of following religion or capitalism or materialism or some philosophy or some other ideology which is always a trap of finding your truth.

For example, one day some three years ago approximately, I reading Bhagavad Gita As It Is. And reading it felt good but then after a month I joined ISKCON’s Satsang and started absorbing the ideology in my mind.

I am not saying that there’s no truth in spiritual teachings. What I am saying is that your truth is not an ideology, it’s your inner wisdom.

No amount of ideology can replace your inner wisdom, your truth.

So as you might infer, I stopped going to ISKCON satsangs for various reasons but one of them was the heavy use of Hindu mythology.

I still read the Gita from time to time but I don’t subscribe to one ideology.

Now you may think what does being yourself look like?

Although I am far from perfect but for me, I journal every day and I write in my blog sometimes. This helps me observe what I am thinking daily and stay on track with living my truth.

I believe in hope and all things real like honesty, love, faith, generosity, etc. And I have social anxiety and so sometimes I am unable to be generous to all people, but I try my best to have hope most of the time.

Overcoming social anxiety is something I have to work on but that’s just what comes with the package that is called me.

Being yourself is also full of struggles. Choosing commerce or arts instead of science stream is hard when no one in your family is from commerce or arts. Choosing to work in a corporate job is hard when all your family members and relatives work in the government.

But it comes with the knowledge that you are being you. You are living life from your inner wisdom.

Have you ever travelled solo to some new place? I did. When I was in class 10, age 14, I went to the city to eat in a restaurant alone skipping tuition classes. My parents were worried thinking about where I had gone. But I returned home safely.

Also, I had done stupid things all my life with friends or alone.

Something inside me guided me. And I believe the more we allow this guidance to guide us in new situations, the wiser we become.

This is what fuelled pioneers- freedom, adventure, and self-expression.

But you may think that spiritual teachings ask us to find these values in ourselves- to find God in yourself, in man.

I guess you could say if finding God is what inspires you, then that is your truth. If someone is inspired by adventure, then that is their truth.

Conclusion

Swami Vivekananda taught humanity to believe in oneself.

 And that’s why I say what will make you happiest is to be yourself, to live by your truth, to believe in yourself, and to be original and truly free.

Thank you for reading this blog post. Please share this blog post and answer this one question-

What is your truth that you believe in?

All Seeking Is A Bad Habit

In this blog post, I will write about why I think seeking anything is a bad habit and it is just that-a bad habit.

Some people call it bad karma, but I will just call it a bad habit.

When we ask ourselves what is the purpose of life, or what is the best way to make money today, we are essentially asking a very essential question that is important for our survival.

But if we ask ourselves why are we asking ourselves or others what the purpose of life is, then we will end up with a feeling, a deep desire or a fear after we have dug deep enough.

This feeling is supposed to be faced in my opinion. It is this fear that we need to dive into.

It is important to seek but this seeking is the cause of our suffering, in my opinion. Seeking money, fame, power, love, beauty, etc. is not bad but seeking them will create suffering.

When we seek we are acting out of habit. It is very difficult to not seek, even for a jobless person. Even a person who sleeps all day is seeking comfort. And when the comfort ends, he/she suffers.

That feeling that is before all questions, if dealt with and understood, can reduce our suffering and seeking.

I think that seeking God is also a cause of suffering. But if we don’t seek God we will not be free from suffering. And this is good suffering.

In my opinion, if we know the source of all seeking, then the seeking will automatically become more meaningful. And not knowing the source will trap us in a habitual pattern of seeking more things without satisfaction.

Conclusion

To conclude, I think we need to break from this bad habit of seeking and establish ourselves in something that is not related to seeking, maybe it is meditation, journaling or reading or writing or running or listening to piano music or any passion that we have.

Thank you for reading this blog post. Please share it with your friends and answer this question:

What do you do that is not related to seeking?

Faith Is Important

In this blog post, I will write about why faith is important in life.

So basically, I was of the school of thought that unless one experiences something one should not believe in it.

Whether it’s belief in God or belief in any idea or principle or anything that changes the way we live life, I used to think that we should try out new ideas and then prove to ourselves if it is true in our experience.

But I have always wondered what the most worthy goal in life is and what is the most real and meaningful cause to which I can fight and dedicate my life without feeling like I am wasting my time in life.

And from there started my pursuit of Truth.

What is the truth? What is the most real thing? What is worthy of hard work and personal struggle? What is worthy of fighting for? What is not empty? What is true?

At first in class 11, I went to get a better education to find this real thing. I thought if I can get into a good school I will be able to dedicate my life to it and find something worth fighting for. But questions started appearing in my mind.

I doubted my beliefs and asked myself,” I know that a good education is very important. But I don’t feel happy. I am suffering. And I have lost my sense of direction and hunger in life. Also, I don’t even know if this subject I am studying is meaningful. I want to be an engineer. But why? Why do I want to be an engineer? Why? I could do career counselling but will I really find the answer in other professions? I will feel empty even then, and I will probably ask the why question after I lose my passion for that profession.”

So I started losing interest in formal education. (I am in college now studying seriously.)

Then I started pursuing money in business by learning digital marketing. I started a blog, a youtube channel, a clothing e-commerce store, etc.

And I found success here and there but I still had the feeling of emptiness and meaninglessness that gradually entered my pursuit of money.

I remember I was doing an internship as an insurance agent for a big company and I did well in the interview and training. I was punctual all the time and very serious about success, but I gave up before the joining date because I could not see meaning in that job. (Little did I know that the meaning that I am searching for is in me and not outside in objects.)

So I started losing interest in money. (I am regardlessly going to start a business in the future)

Then I started feeling depressed.

But…

This is where things changed. I started believing in God. I surrendered and took action.

Life without God is empty and meaningless. Even things that are meaningful in the beginning seem meaningless if we don’t believe in something real.

If one believes in God, then a simple thing looks beautiful, one finds joy in the little things in life. But if one doesn’t believe in God, then all the wealth of the world can’t make one happy.

It started with me one day noticing that a girl and her mother at NIMHANS chanting a religious mantra one evening while chilling, and it hit me that I can also try that approach. I could try to have faith in God. Since nothing works, then let’s try this.

And I found that it is a source of immense love, power, strength and wisdom. It made suffering make sense and my life got better.

Then one day I was reading Swami Vivekananda’s quote-

“You cannot believe in God until you believe in yourself.” – Swami Vivekananda

And I started consciously strengthening my belief in myself.

What I am trying to say through this blog post is this-

Faith is important.

Without faith, one will find it very difficult to find the truth.

Personally, I still get doubts but I have surrendered my fears to God. I know that there is a reality that is truly real. I don’t need to hold on to objects of the mind or the world to feel secure. I just need to hold on to God.

The reason faith is important for finding the truth, is that faith and truth are not opposite words, but where truth cannot be reached by the mind, faith is the guide to truth.

Thank you for reading this blog post. If you liked this post then please comment, why is faith important to you?

Why I Love EDM (Electronic Dance Music)

In this blog post, I will write about EDM(electronic dance music) and why I love it.

I used to think that it wasn’t possible to explain why one loves a certain type of music. But I will take the risk and try to explain it because I love EDM so much.

Reasons Why I Love It

Here’s a list of reasons-

  1. It makes me feel free
  2. When I hear it I feel connected to other people
  3. It has the perfect balance between feelings and dance
  4. The beats automatically make me want to move and dance
  5. Remixes give new life to original songs
  6. I love the “noise”, it helps me focus when writing
  7. It feels positive

So that’s why I love EDM.

When I was in high school, I loved listening to remixes of Hindi songs and from there I started listening to David Guetta’s songs. That’s how my love for EDM started.

Now my favourite artists are Avicii(RIP), Martin Jensen, The Chainsmokers, Jonas Blue, Martin Garrix, etc. in no particular order.

Why I love EDM in a few words would be “the noise where feelings meet dance”.

There’s another reason why I love EDM. That’s because of hope.

When I listen to EDM, I am immediately transported to a place where there’s hope. I don’t know how to describe it but it feels like the end, the final place, the destination and so on.

It’s the goal I want to reach and listening to EDM temporarily transports me to that goal.

Maybe you feel the same way or differently about your favourite music. It’s just how I feel.

What do I intend to do with this type of music? I aim to listen to it more, learn about it more, learn music, learn music production and DJing as a hobby and learn to appreciate it more.

Conclusion

To sum up, EDM is “the noise where feelings meet dance” for me. And that’s why I love it.

Thank you for reading this blog post. Please comment- What is your favourite genre of music? How does it make you feel?

8 Reasons Why I Need To Learn Santhali (My Mother Tongue)

In this blog post, I will write about why it’s important that I learn and know Santhali, my mother tongue.

I am a Santhal, from the Santali community. We are one of the biggest Adivasi communities in India and we have our own language, our own script, our own religion and everything else.

Growing up I didn’t get the opportunity to be surrounded by people from my Santhali community. And so I don’t know how to speak my mother tongue fluently.

My grandparents came to the city from their village for jobs. My parents know Santhali but I face problems with that.

So you might think, why is this guy writing a blog post on learning his mother tongue? Isn’t knowing English and Hindi enough to live a good life in India?

My answer is “No”.

Knowing my mother tongue is important for many reasons-

  1. Survival of our identity as Santhals
  2. Survival of our culture
  3. Empowering our people to live self-actualised lives
  4. Contributing to the larger society through sharing the wisdom and lessons from our culture
  5. Celebrating the sacrifices of our leaders
  6. Creating Santhali literature in our own Ol Chiki script
  7. Feeling unity and pride for our community
  8. Upholding our religious and spiritual practices and traditions

I am sure there are more reasons but these came to my mind at the moment.

So currently I am learning Santhali and Ol Chiki script on my own. I would love some guidance but even if I don’t get the guidance, I believe I will be able to learn them very quickly with conscious effort if I am focused.

I am listening to the Santhali Akhra radio show on AIR Kolkata Geetanjali Akashwani radio station almost every day and I am asking my family members to speak to me in Santhali. I also listen to Santhali songs and I especially love Singrai Soren’s “Sekej Sekej” song.

Sometimes I feel demotivated due to my slow progress but I need to have faith in myself and a little patience to learn the language and the script.

So this was my blog post on why it’s important for me to learn Santhali. Please comment- What is your mother tongue and do you know it well?

Thoughts on Dickinson (Season 1) – Series on Apple TV+ (Hope)

I watched season 1 of Dickinson series on Apple TV+ (on the life of Emily Dickinson, the American poet) probably two months ago. And I loved it and wanted to share my thoughts on it. I didn’t get the time to watch season 2 but I will watch it soon.

So first of all the thing that makes me love the series is the personality and acting of Hailee Steinfield as Emily Dickinson. I think the acting of Emily Dickinson is exaggerated in order to make the series more entertaining but I have no doubt that the lessons from Emily Dickinson’s life are accurately conveyed.

Here are some things I loved about the series-

  1. The personality of Emily Dickinson
  2. The feminism
  3. The expression of a complex individual in the form of poetry

Personality of Emily Dickinson

I loved how the personality of Emily Dickinson is portrayed in the series. Even though anyone who had seen Emily Dickinson in real life is not alive now and even though her personality may be exaggerated I feel inspired and I enjoy watching her in the series.

She seemed very interesting, even though she was not a published poet, even though she didn’t marry and even though she was dependent on her family for survival.

I think the acting is fabulously done by Hailee Steinfield. Hailee herself has a great personality of her own but in the series where she plays Emily Dickinson, she acts as a daughter, sister, friend, lover, feminist, etc.

The use of the modern English Language instead of old English makes her more relatable. Also, the dialogues sound really cool.

The Feminism

I remember that Emily would raise her voice again patriarchy and have a very liberal perspective.

She seemed like a very progressive-minded person and ahead of her time. What she thought two hundred years ago, we are thinking now.

She also mocked the fact that only men could do certain things and women were not allowed to do them, things such as attending university and so on.

The Expression Of A Complex Individual In The Form Of Poetry

Now, this is purely my opinion that she was a complex individual. She had depth in her character. She was extraordinary at writing poems and was a brilliant thinker.

When I read her poems I feel strong emotions. I am moved by her poems and I even have her poem on my laptop wallpaper.

Her poems are true, authentic and bold. And I am sure there are many other adjectives to describe her poems. But to me, her words are like a shining ray of light in the darkness of mundane life.

And all that comes from Emily Dickinson, who never published her poems in her lifetime?
At every point in time while watching the series I could relate to Emily because I am similar to her, not as a poet or a writer but as a person who loves expression. This is purely my opinion.

Conclusion

Now the point I am trying to make by sharing this review of Dickinson(Apple TV+ series) is that of the message of Emily Dickinson’s life.

I think her life teaches hope in a person’s life. How she decided to sacrifice her fame as a poet and kept writing even though no one would read and appreciate it in her life except a few people, is inspiring.

Although her poems were discovered and published later after her death, I think that the dedication to living a life where she followed her passion for writing, is inspiring.

Thank you for reading this blog post. Please comment- Have you read any of Emily Dickinson’s poems?

Being Emotional Is Not Bad For Men

In this blog post, I will write, in my opinion, about being emotional and how it is healthy and shouldn’t be seen as a bad thing for both men and women but especially men.

Let me tell you a story before diving deeper into the topic.

Story Time

I recently watched Tokyo Ghoul, the anime. The protagonist of the anime series is Kaneki who is an emotional person and likes reading books.

But he has low self-esteem. And he went through physical torture from an enemy which left him traumatized. He is also mentally unstable and has developed an alternate personality to cope with the trauma which I am not sure how much of it is scientifically accurate.

His whole journey throughout seasons 1 through the last season is to integrate his personality and introspect in his dreams through various events and external conflicts.

Ultimately, in the end, he emerges victoriously and becomes confident and integrated and lives a happy life after conquering his enemies and bringing peace among ghouls and humans.

I am sure he loves reading even now after integrating his personality. He is an emotional and happy man. 

Deep Dive

Now let’s dive deep.

In my opinion, being emotional has nothing to do with being weak or being less manly. It is totally normal to be emotional.

We can cry after watching a sad movie, laugh heartily at a joyful event, express grief over someone’s death. 

We need not suppress our emotions as men. 

I don’t know exactly how much suppressing our emotions harms our mental health because I am not a psychiatrist. But I strongly believe that no feelings are bad. All feelings must be felt. 

So the next time anyone tries to make you feel ashamed about expressing your feelings, just ignore them and express your feelings.

I know that it’s harder than the way I say it but we need to try. Maybe you are in the wrong place if you are not allowed to express your feelings.

It’s not selfish of you. It is totally normal to express your feelings in a healthy way.

Conclusion

Being emotional is not bad because expressing your feelings is normal and natural in my opinion for both men and women.

Thank you for reading this blog post. Please comment-

How do you feel when you or someone else makes you suppress your emotions? Do you feel good or not so good? And why do you think that happens?

A Special Blog Post for Making You Feel Good

So for the past weeks I have been through a strange mental journey of coming to a temporary conclusion of the belief that-“Life is hard”.

You may say, “Well of course life is hard.”

I am not questioning this strong fact. But let’s ask ourselves a simple question for the sake of curiosity and truth- “Does believing in the fact that life is hard make us do work where we can give a 100% of ourselves?”

Before answering the question, I would like to give you a brief background information.

I am in the process of healing from my mental health problems. I have severe social anxiety and a little bipolar disorder. For instance, I find it hard to go out of my home on a daily basis because I am afraid of interacting with people. And I have problems forcing myself to do anything because most of the time my mood dictates every action I take. It makes me feel crazy to do anything if I must use willpower to force motivation into my soul. Mind over body does not work for me consistently.

However, I can best do the things I have a strong emotionally powerful vision for or things that I am passionate about. The problem is my curiosity questions all the powerful visions and I am not passionate about something in the Steve Jobs style.

“You have to have a lot of passion for what you do… because if you don’t, any rational person would give up.”

Steve Jobs

Now, story time.

So nowadays I am staying at home most of the time partly because of anxiety and partly because I switched to an online Bachelor of Business Administration degree(I know most of my friends have graduated but I don’t compare myself to others).

And sometimes I get two of my cousin brothers (10year old’s) visiting our home during at noon time. They basically watch anime and only ask me if a certain movie is on hotstar or Netflix. I just tell them, and they do everything else. They are experts little 10year old’s. Right??

So, one day they were watching an anime that I watched season one of years ago. The anime’s name is Tokyo Ghoul.

As I watched it with them, I got interested.

In my free time I watched all the seasons of Tokyo Ghoul, and I was particularly inspired by a character in this anime.


His name is Hide (spelled Hye-Day). He is not the hero. He is the hero Kaneki’s best friend. In fact, we don’t see much of him in the anime. But his role in the ending of the anime is significant.

He is the person who is selfless, sacrificing, a true leader.

I don’t want to spoil the anime for you. You can watch Tokyo Ghoul on Netflix.

But I just wonder, what makes a person so determined and selfless. It’s certainly not in believing that life is hard that a person does selfless acts.

One can occasionally do hard things in life, but it takes extraordinary reason to do hard things consistently and becoming successful at it and “Life is hard” is not an extraordinary reason.

So I just started experimenting with different perspectives. First, I used the belief “Life is hard” to motivate myself to study more. I studied consistently for a week for a short amount of time. It was consistent. I chose this belief from observing people in my life. It’s their belief.

But the process of forcing myself was mentally taxing and exhausting. I was not happy.

Secondly, I resumed to my normal way of being and I read fiction novels and listened to my favorite songs.

I realized from all this that an inspiring future expectation creates passion. But it is not easy to have an inspiring future expectation that is also realistic.

So I am going to my career counselor for an appointment to help me pinpoint my post-graduate plans for me.

But to answer the question- “Does believing in the fact that life is hard make us do work where we can give a 100% of ourselves?”

The answer is NO!

I know life is hard. I also know this- life is beautiful. Beauty mesmerizes us and a beautiful future inspires all of us.

And it is not possible to give 100% of yourself or myself to the work unless you or I secretly love that work.

Thank you for reading this blog post. Also, I am not a mental health or career expert. I am Anirban, I am just an average person. This was a blog post about my realizations and story. If you like this post, then share it and comment what you want to comment. See you next time!