Category: Mental Health

Love And Accept Yourself: Don’t Seek Approval From Others

The author writes about his experience if seeking approval from others in the past and realizing the futility in doing it.

Loving Who You Are: No Approval Seeking

Loving who you are is probably one of the most ignored actions of human beings. We want approval from others.

Everybody has insecurities, but we don’t accept them easily.

Instead, we engage in negative self-talk and scold ourselves for being insecure.

We want approval from others but even if they approve of us, we still feel empty.

In my short life, I have been wanting approval and I have realized that if I run after approval and care about what other people think of me, I’ll never truly be happy.

My Story: Birla High School

When I was in class 10, I studied hard to score 84.6%, and then in class 11 I got admitted into Birla High School(BHS), which is one of the most elite high schools in Kolkata and even India as a whole.

Part of the reason I got into BHS was to make my parents proud. 

But I wasn’t proud of myself. 

I got my parents’ temporary approval by getting into BHS, but I didn’t approve of myself.

I still disliked being lonely and I hated myself.

Furthermore, I hated my personality, my lack of confidence, my inability to make friends, my weakness of not being a leader and I didn’t like my stream of subject – science.

Not only that, but I even read multiple self-help books like “Psycho-Cybernetics” by Maxwell Maltz to “fix” myself. But nothing worked. 

Because there was nothing to “fix”.

I needed to accept myself.

I needed to tell myself that I loved myself and that I was sorry for hating myself.

And then I needed to change my self-talk.

But I didn’t do any of these actions because I didn’t know how to do them.

I was lost back then.

Conclusion

Today, however, I have started to realize that no matter how much approval I seek, I’ll still feel empty inside.

First I need to accept myself fully.

I need to love myself.

I have an app on my phone called “Finch” and it is a to-do list app for neurodivergent people.

Likewise, I have a to-do item on it that says “Pause and say ‘thank you’ to myself”.

And I find it very soothing to thank myself every day.

So yeah, loving who you are is an underrated skill that everyone should learn.

Thank you for reading this line! It means a lot.

Say “Yes” to Life

The author writes why saying “Yes” is as important as saying “No” to life.

Daily writing prompt
How often do you say “no” to things that would interfere with your goals?
View all responses

I don’t usually say “No” but I wish I had said it more.

I think I’m not clear about what I want.

Sure I want to buy a house, buy a car, a bike, and have a certain net worth. But I don’t think I’m clear on my purpose in life.

I mean I don’t value money or any kind of scarce resource more than time. 

I value relationships, time, people, etc. more than money.

In fact I say “Yes” more than I say “No”.

I want to meet more people, have more interactions, go out more, read more books, learn more courses, etc. 

I don’t want to work more to earn money. I want to do what’s best for me.

And earning money isn’t the only thing in the world.

It is important but it’s not everything.

I think being a good human being is what’s most important. And to be a good person, we need to interact more, talk to more people, understand ourselves, write more journals, etc.

So yeah I don’t say “No” much but I do say “Yes” to things that might interfere with my goals.

I mean what is life more than a journey towards your goals. 

And if you say “No” to the things that would enrich your life in the journey, there’s no point in living such a life.

So I say “Yes”.

Thanks for reading this line! It means a lot.

Attending the Passenger concert in Bangalore 2025

The author shares his experience at the Passenger concert Bangalore 2025. It was intimate, cozy and lovely.

I attended the Passenger concert in Bangalore yesterday. 

I still can’t believe it.

I attended the concert only to listen to “Let Her Go” and nothing else because that’s the only song I knew of Passenger.

And it was so awesome, probably one of those days you can’t forget in your entire life.

But there were some difficulties along the way.

For example, the security people won’t let me take my backpack inside the venue.

And I almost got angry.


But my sister asked me to send the bag through the Uncle Delivery app, so that I could attend the concert.

I had never used Uncle Delivery but I was surprised to see it was so easy.

After a few minutes of walking here and there, I entered the concert around 8:15 pm I guess.

And the concert hadn’t begun.

So I was able to see the beginning of the concert and the full concert.

It was an experience you couldn’t forget.

It was not as good as the KK concert that I attended many years ago, nor was it as high in energy as the Martin Garrix concert I attended last year I think so.

But the concert felt intimate and sad in a good way.

And if I had to give the concert a rating it would definitely be a 4.9 out of 5 because they didn’t let me take my backpack inside.

And if you ask me what I learnt from this experience, I would say I learnt to follow my heart.

One of the songs Michael Rosenberg (Passenger) sang was about dreams. 

And I think it was a good song and a song that is appropriate for Indian audiences.

Because in India we are encouraged to follow what society wants of us and not to follow our dreams.

Anyways, another thing I learnt from this experience is to take responsibility for my actions.

If I had been more cautious I wouldn’t have brought my backpack to the concert even if the terms and conditions mentioned a big backpack and my backpack was reasonably small.

So a lot of people had come to the concert. Couples, single people, groups of friends, etc. And I felt very good when I saw them.

One of the couples in front of me seemed so lovely.

The girl looked like she was ill and the boy held her close.

It was so lovely.

The people were so happy.

The weather was so good, no rain, moderate temperature.

And that’s all that matters.

When I was listening to the “Let Her Go” song, I was recalling my memories of my friends. And it was lovely.

And if you ask me what advice I have for people who want to attend a Passenger concert later in the future, I would say just relax and enjoy the concert. It’ll be an intimate experience. So make sure to bring your friends also.

And what review would I like to write for Passenger?

Here’s what I’d say-

“I loved the concert. It was intimate and cozy and lovely. I will remember it for the rest of my life. I didn’t know most of the songs except “Let Her Go” and I feel very satisfied that I witnessed Michael Rosenberg sing “Let Her Go”. The security didn’t let me take my backpack inside though. I mean at least they should have checked the bag and allowed me to take it inside. But I loved the concert. I’d give a 4.9/5 rating.”

Thanks for reading this line. It means a lot!

I wish I had learned to prioritise myself earlier in life

Share a lesson you wish you had learned earlier in life.

I wish I did what I did in life – for myself.

I wish I had prioritised myself while doing something.

This is a lesson I learnt later in my life.

Earlier in my life I did it to please others.

But once I realise that if I continue doing things for others, I will keep feeling low and eventually give up.

I’m still working on doing stuff for myself.

And I don’t claim to be perfect. But I’m trying.

When I prioritise myself and do things for myself, I feel more satisfied.

Thanks for reading this line. It means a lot!

You Know When I Look Up At The Sky – An Original Poem

You know when I look up at the sky
I think of you
When I walk on the ground
I think of you

You know when I am afraid of death
I think of you
When I feel courageous to conquer life
I think of you

You know when I’m lonely
I think of you
When I have a room full of friends
I think of you

You know when I have won in life
I think of you
When I have conquered myself
I still think of you

-Anirban Saren

I wish

I wish I had the courage to tell her

That I think about her

That I care for her

That I don’t want to lose her

–

I wish I had the intelligence to understand her

To feel her pain

To let her make mistakes but

To let me feel her pain

–

I wish I was closer to her

To protect her

To be by her side

Even when she didn’t want me

–

I wish I could be someone she prefers

Someone she thinks is handsome

And be hot and cool

And everything she adores

–

I wish I could tell her

That I love her

That I just want her soul

That I just want to be there for her.

–

Anirban Saren

I could let go of my anger

What could you let go of, for the sake of harmony?

If I could let go of something and if it brings harmony,  I would let go of my anger.

I used to think anger was necessary to get justice.

But now I think differently.

I’ve been in NIMHANS for over 2.5 months and my perspective has changed.

What anger does is make us think emotionally and not logically.

And when I get angry, the first thing I try to do is box breathing and the 5-4-3-2-1 method.

It helps to do some kapalbhati and bhastrika yoga pranayamas.

I think I have grown a lot in these few months.

So yeah if I had to let it go, I would let go of my anger.

And then think calmly.

Anger is the enemy and we need to let it go.

Thanks for reading this line. It means a lot.

Image credit – https://unsplash.com/photos/selective-focus-photography-of-green-succulent-plant-vHnVtLK8rCc?utm_content=creditShareLink&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=unsplash

I love electronic dance music (EDM)

What is your favorite genre of music?

I love EDM because it gives me pleasure and satisfaction.

I know it’s basically for dancing in the club and it’s not for strong emotions like sadness or calmness.

But I like it.

I’m a person who doesn’t like stimulating music. And EDM is not so stimulating as love songs or sad songs.

I love EDM because of the values it’s built on.

Values like-

  • Freedom
  • YOLO (you only live once)
  • Friendship
  • Love
  • Peace

Yeah so basically EDM resonates with me.

Thanks for reading this line. It means a lot.

I want to teach value education I guess

What is the legacy you want to leave behind?

I remember all I still remember from my secondary school is the value education classes.

They taught me values like honesty, generosity, kindness.. and all that without any conditions.

So you be kind to everyone without any conditions whether they are good to you or they are kind to you.

I don’t care about leaving behind wealth for my future generations or some kind of cult or organisation that I want to last for as long as possible.

I just want to change one person’s life in a good way.

I just want to make them feel included.

Recently one friend/roommate of mine in the psyche ward said I was his best friend before he got discharged.

I mean I am good to everyone and I am kind and benevolent.

I make people feel included and I am friendly.

I’m grateful that my friend thought I was his best friend.

I mean this is what makes my life successful.

To be a good friend, a good helper, a good person,etc.

I guess my thoughts are all unorganised because I’m in a hurry and I’m kind of busy.

Thanks for reading this line.

I got a broken skull at 5

Have you ever broken a bone?

After school hours, I was playing “pakda pakdi” with my friend Sudip and he accidentally pushed me at the door hinges of our classroom.

And I got hurt on the right side of my skull.

The injury marks are still there.

So a little amount of blood flowed I guess.

And I started crying.

I came home with my sister who studied at the same school on the regular school bus.

We informed our mother.

I was taken to the hospital with my mother.

And I remember a lot of people from my school came to the hospital before I got treated.

I mother held me in her arms as the doctor stitched my skull.

And a few weeks later the principal of the school and other teachers visited our home.

I mean they were good people. It was a good school.

The school’s name was “Vivekananda Academy School”.

Well I guess I wanted to share this with you.

Thanks for reading this line.